


Self Preservation // Tommy Shelby

by Miss_nightshade



Category: Peaky Blinders (TV), Peaky Blinders RPF
Genre: Adultery, Angst, Cheating, F/M, Heartache, Non-Graphic Smut, Pregnancy, Runaway, Unplanned Pregnancy, non-descriptive smut, shelby reader
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-10
Updated: 2018-06-24
Packaged: 2019-05-04 23:33:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14604162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_nightshade/pseuds/Miss_nightshade
Summary: Anonymous asked: Can I have an angst fix where the reader finds out Tommy cheating on her with Grace, but she’s pregnant (reader). in an attempt not to rip the family apart she writes a letter to poll saying that she cheated and she pregnant with another mans child, that she won’t force Tommy to raise that child. So she moves away and completely drops off the grid. -Lola





	1. Part One

**Author's Note:**

> Requests are open.  
> you can head over to my Tumblr (tvseriesimagines - Miss Nightshade) or you can request in the comments.

Something was wrong, she could feel it. But everything was the same, nothing stood out, nothing was different, it was as she left it. Except there was a new coat on the rack, a woman’s coat, a woman’s coat that didn’t belong to her. The sickly-sweet smell of perfume hung in the room, a lump formed in her throat, her palms becoming sweaty. She silently placed her keys on the table, attempting to calm her ragged breathing. She stood there staring at the coat, it looked familiar, it was familiar, she just couldn’t pin it down. She knew who’s coat this was, the name was on the tip of her tongue. She knew this person, the one who was currently screwing her husband, she knew them. Might have even gone as far as to refer to her as a friend.

Mrs. Shelby ventured further into the house, gaze sneaking a peep into Tommy’s office. Two glasses of whiskey caught her eye, one was completely empty, probably Tommy’s, the other had a ring of red lipstick around to top, probably the mystery woman’s. She paused for a second, she’d seen a small piece of fabric out of the corner of her eye. The sickly-sweet perfume was back, his office was coated in the smell. How did he expect to hide this from her, say it was Polly or Ada? Brush, it off as nothing? Say he couldn’t smell it? Make up some elaborate explanation that it was for her and he’d accidentally dropped the bottle? It seemed to dawn on her in that moment. She had smelt it before, all over him. Tommy had said he was buying her an anniversary present and the lady in the shop when a little overboard, trying to get him to smell it. Was it a fling. That’s most likely what he would say if she confronted him, ‘It was in the moment, it didn’t mean anything, I’m sorry’, but she had a gut feeling. She knew deep down this was more. She carefully moved her way through the room, closer and closer to the desk. Tommy’s tie lay on the oak desk, upon further inspection, his shirt and suit jacket lay on the ground beneath the chair. Accompanied by a cream dress, and a plain skin colored hat. Y/N stood there staring and staring, her mind was blank, no thought seemed to pass through, only an inaudible loop of her doctor’s appointment flash through her head over and over. You are with child…. Pregnant, Mrs. Shelby… Serious risk…. Between us, I would advise you to terminate, illegally of course…. I’ll call a specialist midwife for you…. I need to inform you one more time…. You will most likely die…. do you understand the risks of have these children? …. Mrs. Shelby are you okay…. Mrs. Shelby…. Nurse ge–….

She was snapped out of the trance but the sound of a lamp breaking followed by a sickening laugh. Maybe it was curiosity maybe it wasn’t, either way, she found her feet leading her upstairs to the master bedroom, her bedroom. She stood outside the door, fingertips brushing against the door handle, her heart seemed to stop, her breathing shallowing out. She felt herself go light headed, black spot appearing in her vision, she felt like she was floating, drifting away into a peaceful place, forgetting for one second what was happening on the other side of the door. Y/N backed away from the door, crumbling to her knees and curling up on the ground. She rocked herself back and forth, going over the options in her head. The doctor’s appointment came to mind, then her wedding and then his proposal, when he came back from war and when he went to war. The day they first kissed, the day they started dating, the day they met. Her life seemed to flash before her eyes, every moment they spent together, the good and the bad, the funny and the stupid. She knew Tommy, she knew what he would do if he knew, she pulled herself together just enough to crawl away from the doorway, sitting at the top of the stairs, relishing in the memories of a once happy marriage.

Y/N sat there for what felt like hours, listening to Tommy’s adulterous actions. It was like when you see something terrifying and just can’t look away. She just couldn’t move. She was numb, silently crying at the top of the staircase. The tears cascading down her cheeks, dropping into her lap, the wet patches growing with each teardrop. Each time she licked her lips, salt invaded her taste buds, leaving a bitter reminder in her mouth as if the noises weren’t enough. She could hear everything, the creak of the mattress, the rustle of the covers, and the whisper of her name. Grace. Her small hands gripping her throat, soothing the burning. “In”, she whispered out breathlessly, closing her eyes, trying to settle herself. “and out”. She repeated the words over and over like a chant. Slowing her heartbeat, before readying herself for what she was going to do next. She didn’t even feel herself moving as she stood from her spot, moving down the stairs as if she were floating. Leaving the house in a daze wondering off to god knows where. 

 

A single letter lay in the middle of the dinner table addressed to Polly, in the telltale handwriting that belonged to Y/N. Tommy moved towards the table, reaching out for the letter. “Thomas don’t”, Ada warned as she slapped his hand away, Polly moved around the two taking the letter and sitting down at the head of the table. “She clearly doesn’t want you to read it that’s why its addresses to Polly”. The others followed suit, sitting around the table all looking at poll. Ada grabbed a bottle of whiskey, pouring a glass for each of them.

After taking a deep breath, she opened the letter, taking care not to rip the delicate paper. Holding it as though it were the most precious thing in the world. Polly softly ran her fingers over the delicate writing, tracing over the signature of a girl she considered her daughter. The name Shelby scribbled out several times. The letter stained with tears, some of the words nearly impossible to read. She had to compose herself for a few seconds before gaining the courage to read the words.

My Dearest Aunt Polly,

It’s with this overpowering guilt weighing on me that I find myself with the strength to clean my conscience, for the past five months I have been having an affair. For obvious reasons, I won’t be sharing his identity. My actions have led to me become pregnant, I am carrying this man’s child. I can’t face the others, I can’t even face you, which seems to shame me more. The embarrassment I’ve caused this family will be my burden to bear, no one outside this family needs to know. Believe it or not, I am trying to make everything better.

Turns out, that sometimes, sometimes you have to do the wrong thing… sometimes you have to make a big mistake to figure out how to make things right. How to find yourself and you just have to do what’s right for you, even if it does hurt others, the ones you love. My keys to the betting shop and the family house and inside the second envelope, I’ve had my items removed from the property and arranged for a wonderful lady to replace me with Finn’s home tutoring. Mistakes are painful, my mistakes are painful, I know who I am now.

I know you are angry but by the grace of God, you find some place in your heart to harbor forgiveness for me. Know that I am safe. I am to marry this man, in a feeble attempt to save what little reputation I have left. I would offer you the place of godmother, however, I believe that may be overstepping slightly. The years I spent in Small Heath shall always be dear to me, and the memories that come along with them, thank you for making me feel so welcome and wanted.

\- Yours always, Y/F/N, Shelby, Y/L/N.  
Polly crumpled the neatly written letter into a ball before throwing it into the fire pit. Not wanting the boys to read the content of the young girl’s last goodbye. To them, it would have only added to the anger, a blinding rage to go after this mystery man would consume them. But to Polly, the one person who knew the girl better Tommy knew, who knew her better than herself, she knew without a doubt in her mind that the content of that letter was word after word of lies. And sadly, she had her suspicions as to what the true reason behind her leaving was. It whole thing was humorous really, the way she used Tommy’s guilty to spine her own story, simultaneously creating a scapegoat for herself, destroying her ties here, that even if she wanted to return home, she wouldn’t be welcomed anywhere in the city. “What’d it say?” She snapped herself out of the downward spiral of thoughts, looking up at the table surrounded by her nephews and niece. “Pol?”

“Hmm, Oh, nothing much”. She picked up her glass of whiskey in an attempt to stop the shaking in her hands, only to put it back down a second later as the urge to throw it at Tommy’s head grew. Sitting there acting as though he cared, probably not even taking into consideration that his fiancé knew about Grace. “She left because she’s pregnant”, Polly hesitated for a second, internally fighting herself, debating if she would allow the young girl to flee and start afresh or set the cogs in motion to return her. The answer was obvious and she knew it, Y/N didn’t make this decision lightly, probably went over every outcome in her head, but the girl was alone, there was no mystery man, she’d fled into the big scary world all by herself. No, she would respect the girl’s wishes, a final goodbye if you will. So begrudgingly she continued, sealing her fate. “With another man’s child”. And that was it blind rage eloped Tommy as he threw the context of the table to the floor. Pausing for a second before storming out of the house, Arthur and John soon following after, most likely going to the garrison. To Grace.


	2. Part 2

Polly stood off to the side of the dance floor, isolating herself from the toffs waltzing around the extravagant hall. She understood why Tommy needed her and the others here, how it would help the company with funds, - the legal side of course, these toffs would never buy into anything that would compromise their precious reputations- but this was just ridiculous. Polly was soon snapped out of her gloomy thoughts, by a soft hand tapping her shoulder. “Polly?” The young woman question as though she were unsure as to the identity of the older woman. It took Polly a moment or two to recognise the woman before her, the last time she’d seen her was the morning she left. And now stood before her, seven years later, head to toe in diamonds and pearl, the finest ivory ball-gown fitting her like a glove. “Oh, Polly. It’s so good to see you”. Y/n smiled joyfully, her eyes lighting up her whole face, as her cheeks flared up a pale rosy colour. She turned gracefully to the side snatching up two champagne flutes for the waiter conveniently walking by, keeping one for herself and handing the other to Polly. Polly took the champagne with a shaky hand, looking over her shoulder for any sign of Thomas.

“You too Y/n. So, what are you doing here?” Polly mumbled to her, trying to catch her bearings. Overcome with the onslaught of emotions bearing down on her, the happiness and joy of seeing the woman she once considers a daughter standing before her. The Guilt for letting her go and not doing more to make her stay. And the terror of what might happen if Tommy catches so much as a glimpse of her. 

Y/n gently rubbed her hand down the length of Polly’s shoulder, trying to comfort her in a way she once did. “Here as in London or here as in this party?” Y/n questioned jokingly, making light of the tense situation the two found themselves in.

“Well both really”, Polly laughed back. Relaxing into Y/n embrace and company, trying to push the thoughts of Thomas out of her mind, he was probably hiding in a back room somewhere anyways. “And are you still going by Shelby or…”?

“No”, she blurted out all too quickly. Subconsciously trying to end the conversation as fast as she could. She always seemed to get nervous and anxious when bringing up the subject of her past marriage. “Crowned Duchess Y/N Darlington”. Y/n curtsied, tipping her head slightly showing off her tiara. Again, Polly started looking around for any sign of Thomas, knowing that he intended on meeting Duke Darlington and by extension his wife. “You may kiss my hand”, Y/n unintentional knocked Polly out of her head, again as she joked as she extended her hand to her, sticking her nose up in the air in a stereotypical toff way. “Though I also accept hugs”. She looked down on Polly as smile tugging at her lips right after she said it. The two burst out laughing a moment later, drawing the attention of those around them, which only seemed to encourage them.

“So, you’re hosting this Gala?” Polly decided to make some small talk as they made their way over to one of the sitting area, linking their arms together as they made their way through the crowds of people. Once sitting in the soft chairs, the complementary plate of sweet treats, sharing between the two of them, Y/n continued their conversation.

“Yeah, we are, me and my husband. Bloody nightmare though”. She paused looking around the room for a second in distaste. “Can’t stand these parties”, Y/n mumbled as she popped a small pastry into her mouth, the cream collecting at the corners of her lips, only to be swiped away be the pad of her thumb.

“I totally get-“, Polly’s reply was cut off by the sound of two screaming children, they appeared to be arguing over something.

“Jacob”, Y/n suddenly called out, she turned in her chair slightly to face the open ballroom. “Come here”. The boy looked over shocked, worry caught in his eyes as he realized his mother had caught him misbehaving. He slowly moved over to his mother, looking for any excuse to delay himself further.

But eventually, he ended up at his mother’s side, “Yes, Mama?” Jacob looked up through his thick eyelashes, his blue eyes doing his best puppy eyes. Y/n gently picked up the boy and set him in her lap.

“What was that about, young man?” She softly tapped him on his nose, “Hum?” Jacob just nuzzled his head into her shoulder, “Hum”, Y/n started tickling his sides, Jacob started wiggling in her grasp, laughing as he tried to get away from her fingers.

Y/n was too entranced with her son’s laughter to notice the way Polly’s face turned to one of terror or the familiar voice of the men approaching from behind. “It looks as though your wife has already found my Aunt”, Thomas mused with his usual fake face on, as he walked over to the table, with Duke Darlington by his side.

“Papa”, Jacob screamed as he launched himself off of Y/n’s lap, running into his father’s arms, who in turn picked the boy up and sat him on his hip. Roman gave his son a quick kiss on his forehead before walking over to the women and kissing Y/n.

“Dear, this is Mr. Sh-“.

“Thomas”, Y/n stumbled back, quickly taking Jacob from her husband’s grasp and backing away from the table. “Wh-What do you want?”

“What do I want. You’re the one who up and left in the middle of the night”, Thomas moved closer losing the fake smile he’d been wearing since he’d arrived. Polly slowly shifted in her chair ready to get between the two of them if needed. “Pregnant with another man’s child, I might add”. He took a few more steps, now he stood directly in front of Y/n, he looked down at Jacob and stared at the boy for a few seconds before continuing. “But judging by the boy's age and the color of his eyes and hair I’d say he’s mine”. Thomas looked just about ready to kill, Y/n could practically see the anger boiling behind his eyes.

Y/n stepped back again, clutching her son a little closer, as she looked pleadingly towards Roman. “I believe that this conversation should be discussed in private?” He interrupted, trying to mediate between the two of them. “The family estate tomorrow noon”, Thomas nodded in agreement, turning to Roman to take down the address.

Y/n quickly placed her hand on Polly's shoulder, as she whispered in her ear. “please bring the other poll”. Before disappearing out of the grand hall, Roman following behind once he and Thomas were done.

“Would you hurry up. They are going to be here any second”. Y/n snapped to Roman as she rushed around the entrance hall. Rearranging the flowers sat in the large china vase on the mantelpiece, straightening an already straight family portrait, smoothing out each of the boys’ ties and patting down their hair.

Roman quickly grabbed her as she tried to run over to the draped curtains that apparently need adjusting. “Calm down woman. Just breath”. He gently held her face in his hands, foreheads pressed against one another. It took her a moment or two but soon enough she was relaxing in his grasp, and meeting his lips in a soft loving kiss. The boys displeased groans, only just heard in the background, Y/n turned and smiled at her children blowing them a kiss before turning back to her husband. “Feel better?”, she hummed in reply, nuzzling the side of his neck.

Their peace was soon disrupted by the sound of several cars making their way down the long driveway. “Alright, okay, they’re here”. She breathed out slightly panicked, her breathing deep as she broke there embrace to line the boys up in front of their father before she took her place beside him. Nodding to the maid stood silently in the corner wordlessly asking her to open the door once they heard a loud knock.

“Breath”, he whispered as best he could from beside her, as he smiled at the guests entering their house. The two families stood opposite one another, both in awkward silence not knowing what to say. The tense atmosphere was broken by Karl leaving Ada’s side to walk up to the boys a cheery smile on his face as he extended his hand to the middle one.

“Hey. I’m your cousin Karl. It’s nice to meet you”, Karl smile faltered as Jacob let out a disapproving noise at the introduction. The other brothers sharing the same disapproving and somewhat disgusted look.

“Boys”.

“Sorry father”, they said together, their words overlapping sounding as though only one person was talking. They then turned to look at Karl before smiling at him and greeting him.

“shall we”. Roman motioned towards the living room, his other hand gently placed in the middle of Y/n back, guiding her into the other room the others following behind, the boys running past them to their toys placed out in front of the fire.

Everyone was settled down about thirty minutes later, a pot of tea and a small china cup for each of them set out on the central coffee table. John and Karl had wondered off ten mins ago with one of the maids showing them around the many, many rooms of the house. The Jacob and Arthur still sat in front of the fire no longer playing with their toys but instead stuffing their faces with a plate of biscuits. Thomas had decided to sit beside Y/n, thought the two didn’t talk instead the two of them where both staring at the children, he could see himself in the children. Thomas sat up even straighter when he noticed one of the lads approaching them, but he ignored Thomas and ran up to his mother putting on his best face before asking, “Mother can we go back upstairs now?” So, they really he no interest in him.

“Are you-“.

“Yes mother”, it wasn’t surprising the boys had very clearly shown their displeasure in meeting their father after being told about it last night. With a soft nod of her head, Arthur and Jacob were running out of the room and up the stairs, by teddy stayed behind snuggling up to his stuffed bear beside his father’s feet. Y/n leaned back in her chair observing her old family, Roman was making small talk with Polly and Ada getting on surprisingly well, the majority of the chitchat about the kids and Polly’s input on how Thomas was around that age. Arthur was lying on his belly next to where Teddy sat, playing with young lads’ toy train trying to coax him out from his hiding place behind his bear large head. It was beautiful, almost as she’d imagined it.

Her peace was broken as Tommy leaned over the arm of his chair to ask Y/n as quiet as he could, “Do you wish to discuss this in private?” That did seem to be the best idea, things would get pretty heated if Polly was in the room, and if Roman was there he would probably end up punch in Tommy, as lovely as that would be it would only make things worse.

“I think that’ll be best”. Y/n stood, placing her empty teacup on the small table beside her before pointing towards two large double doors at the other end of the room. “this way Thomas”. She quickly kissed Roman on the top of his head, only to look down at her leg to find Teddy tugging on the fabric of her floor-length skirt beside her thigh.

“Mama where are you going?” he pouted up to her, his eyes twinkling.

Y/n knelt down to his height, brushing the back of her fingers against his cheek. “To talk with Mr. Shelby in the other room, is that okay?”

“yes, mama. It’s Okay, mama. Be back soon”. He jumped and wrapped his arms around the back of her neck. Y/n laughed loving how cute her baby boy was. 

“I’m only going into the next room, little one”. She chuckled, prying his hands from around her neck. Kissing his fingertips once she was loose.

“Bye-bye”. Teddy kissed her cheek and the ran back to his spot beside his father’s feet, snuggling back up to his bear.

She sighed defeat shaking her head at her adorable child, “Bye-bye”, she whispered more to herself than her baby boy. Y/n showed Thomas through to one of the more private lounges, originally designed for business meetings, the two walked in silence and sat just a quiet in the large armchairs beside the fire for a moment or two. Y/n shifted in her chair before she decided how to start this sensitive subject. Quick and easy that should do it, “I came home early Thomas, the day I left, that night, I came home early”. The calm, sweet voice that held no hostility or resentment. The gentle smile on her lips as she spoke with him, this was not the Y/N he knew. The woman he had married would currently be trying to cut his ball off, instead, she sat there smiling and talking to him as though he were an old friend and not her adulterous ex-husband.

“You came home early”. Thomas spoke slowly as if speaking to a child, though he was probably trying to get it through his head. He didn’t know what she was on about, ‘came home early’, she couldn’t have known, he was so careful. And if she did, she wouldn’t have just left, that was so out of character, Y/n would have torn him a new one, killed the whore in an instant.

“I came home early”. Y/n confirmed yet again, smiling sadly at Thomas. She paused for a second trying to think how to word what she wanted to say without breaking in front of him. “Sat on the stairs listening to you and her”, ‘And breath’, she told herself feeling her throat drying and her tear ducts burning. This was harder than she expected, she hadn’t thought about it in such a long time and now, with Thomas sat in front of her everything was flooding back, hitting her full force. “I heard everything, the declarations of love, of her beauty. The things you wanted to do, how you wanted her by your side through it all”. Y/n paused as the young maid entered the room placing a glass of whiskey before Thomas and a large glass of wine in front of Y/n, she bowed with a quick ‘milady’ and left. It was almost perfect timing, she quickly took a large mouthful, just what she needed to relax and numb some of the unwanted feelings. “Everything Thomas”. She raked her hands through her hair, taking another sip from the deep red liquid in her wine glass. “Every single thing”. Y/n whispered as she licked the residue from around her mouth, she closed her eyes breathing deeply as she controlled herself. “All I could think was if I stay my children will grow up to call this whore mother”. God, she was so angry, the hatred boiling up, how she hated that whore, the nerve she had. Pretending to be her friend, a confidant, oh how she wanted to chock the life out of her and watch the light disappear from her eyes. If she ever met grace again she was sure she would kill her.

“How do you think I feel”, he stood from the table, his voice raised. He turned a slight red like he usually did, his neck tensed and the veins became more predominant. Grabbing his glass and throwing it at the family portrait of the boys and their father that hung behind her head, the happy smiles seemed a mockery to him. “My sons are calling that man, Father. And want nothing to do with me”, he pointed out in the direction of the living room which they’d just left. “So, how do you think I feel”. He sat back down, elbows reading on his knees and his head in his palms. What had he done, he wanted to tell her that grace was a spy her job was to get in his bed and learn all his secrets, she was meant to be his poison fruit, the one thing he couldn’t resist.

Would she believe him, would it change anything? She seemed happy, she had the same glow that she had on their wedding day, but it was almost constant. The way she looked at Roman was the way she once looked at him, in the midnight hours when the two were at peace when they were one. “You used me, your wife. Played me like a fool for months, lied right to my face, took your whore in our marital bed”. Thomas tried to avoid her eyes, what had he been thinking back then. “So, no. My children will not be a part of your life. You lost the right”. He wasn’t quite sure what scared him the most, losing her and his children forever because of some stupid mistake or her calm domineer with the subtle undertones of anger in this moment, this was real, maybe a little too real. No, the latter defiantly scared him the most, she’d gone past the point of hating, she no longer cared, no longer felt anything for him, the anger wasn’t towards him, she was angry with herself. In that moment, he could honestly say, with no doubt in his mind that she no longer loved him. Yeah, that scared him more.

“What are their names?”

“Thomas… I…”,

“Please, Just this one thing. And I’ll leave you be”.

“One thing?”

“Yes”.

“Well, first of all, I had quadruplets”, She leaned back in her chair feeling a little more at ease. She took a sip of her wine wetting her mouth, which gave her a little longer to prepare herself. “I almost died during labor, broke four of my ribs and had to have a cesarean section in the end”. She flinched slightly remembering the trauma of it, the unbearable pain she felt, how alone she was through it all. “I was in a coma for two months”, Y/n blanked, her mind going back to the darkness, the terrifying darkness that consumed her for those long months. How she could feel death pulling at her and when she finally thought she was freed and made her way to the light, cruel reality set in dragging back to the land of the living.

“The eldest is Jacob”, Y/n pointed to the photo behind her, more specifically the young boy in the middle, “Then there’s Arthur and Teddy, they’re a little complicated. The monsters came out together an umbilical cord wrapped around the two of them, doctors had to pull them out as one”. She pointed to the boy on the right as she said Arthur and boy on the left as she said, Teddy. “And the youngest is Alexandrina, she likes to be called Drina though”.

“I have a daughter”. Thomas stuttered on his words, a daughter, he knew about the boys but a baby girl.

Y/n pulled a small locket from beneath the collar of her dress, opening it before handing it over the Thomas. “Yeah, she’s the sweetest little angel, knows how to keep her brothers in place. Got them wrapped around her fingers she does. Oh, and she’s a daddy’s girl, can’t tear the two of them apart”. As Y/n’s face lit up with the brightest smile at the thought of the two of them she failed to notice the look of pain flash across Tommy’s face, ‘Daddy’s girl’, but that’s his baby girl. “Sadly, though she gets sick a lot. The doctors say it’s common for quads that one of them, possibly two, are weaker than the rest, she just hasn’t been able to kick whatever bug she keeps getting”.

“They all have your eyes if you haven’t noticed. The boys also have that wicked smirk of yours too”. She smiled to herself a particularly sweet memory coming to mind, god that smirk how she loved it so.

“I noticed”, Thomas smiled too, as he remembered a time when she had declared they were the most beautiful eyes she’d ever seen. He still loved her, and maybe she still loved him, if he didn’t ask he wouldn’t get, “I was wondering if maybe, I could. You know, like have them around my house sometime”. He leaned forward, placing his hand on top of Y/n they both looked down at the connecting before making eye contact, they froze for a moment or two until Y/n yanked her hand back and placed both of them in her lap.

“You have got some nerve, Thomas”. She whispered shakily, worried about the connection she felt when they touched, she still longed for him even after all he’d done. “What are you going to do, huh? declare your love, promise never to do it again? Ask me to leave my husband, my life for you? Come running back into your arms? Get over yourself”. She still loved him didn’t she, oh god it was still too soon, all she wanted to do was lean over and kiss those perfect lips. “You lost me, you lose us. And if you think of taking legal action to see them, think of your record. No judge in their right mind would allow you to see the children”. And there’s the Y/n he knew, of course, he didn’t stand a change, she was so happy here, she couldn’t possibly want him back, she couldn’t still love him like he did her. Y/n stood up from her seat and walked back into the other room leaving the door open of Thomas to follow. He only just made it into the room to see Y/n walking out with teddy cooing to him about a bath. There she was slipping away from him yet again, Self fucking Preservation.


End file.
